Relationship in Corona time
We are all experiencing the epidemic that hit us on one clear day before (almost) two years ago. The question being asked how does that meet us within the relationship? And is there a solution that will allow us with the "multiple hours of togetherness", to isolate even without being positive for coronavirus :)
And still, feel good within the relationship.
How does it meet us within the relationship and what should we do?
Rambam said each side should give to others according to their mental needs, without trying to paint the true blue and just to look beautiful.
I think that the need for the person to essentially feel appreciation for a loved one belongs, but still unfortunately as much as we aspire to it, it is not always achievable because we are so worn out that we do not have the long-awaited energy to pass on to another and give him the same respect of love belonging.
But if for a moment we stopped and thought, and realized that as soon as we give love, honor, or a sense of belonging to the other side, we build a bridge that can be crossed in both directions, and those feelings will be received in a double dose.
The best example of this from my mediation room - as a mediator, which embraces quite a few cases of stories between partners, I feel that once there is a dispute about a particular topic between the parties, each side is unable to give the other a sense of appreciation or empathy, the discourse slowly becomes more and more vocal, but once one side stops and perhaps even subconsciously understands that it is possible to "liberate" and respect the other, agree, compromise, understand... The argument has obviously calmed down.
If during that meeting another dispute arises, I emphasize the same respect for consent that the other side has just given to the other party, in that point I see some change! the parties gradually clam down
and more talking than arguing, it reminds them that it is a possibility with all the erosion and anger to grant mental need that exists in us. Once that need is fulfilled the discourse becomes more pleasant, and sometimes also seasoned with touches of love.
Now back home – the more the other side feels valued and loved, the more we will gain peace and comfort, the "cumulative together" will serve us a positive connotation and the need to isolate ourselves as never before.
For healthy communication.